Chapter 12
The Rapon hosts desired to see Ahura, and so Lika sent an arrow-ship, with one hundred thousand angels, properly officered, to Ahura in Vara-pishanaha, inviting him to come on a visit for ten days, bringing his ten thousand attendants with him.
And it thus came to pass that Ahura came to Theovrahkistan, where he was most honorably received and saluted under the Sign MORNING OF JEHOVIH’S LIGHT, and he in turn answered in the Sign MY WORDS SHALL SERVE HIS SONS AND DAUGHTERS!
Accordingly, Lika came down from the throne and greeted Ahura, saying to him: Come, then, and stand in the middle of the throne, so that your voice may delight the Holy Council.
So Ahura ascended the throne, along with Lika, and when the latter sat down, Ahura walked to the middle and saluted the Holy Council with the Sign FIRE AND WATER, and he spoke, saying:
Because You, O Jehovih, have called me in the Sign of the MORNING OF YOUR LIGHT, behold, I am risen up before You, to speak to Your Sons and Daughters.
But how shall I clear myself, O Father! I am like one who had a hidden skeleton, and the place of concealment broken down. Because I was, by You, created alive in the world, why should I not have forever glorified You? This I have asked myself all the days of my life; but You did not trouble to answer me in my curiosity.
When I was young in life, lo, I cried out to You, complaining because You did not make me wise. I said: Behold, You created all the animals on the face of the earth to know more than I in the day of birth. Yes, I did not even know where to find suck, nor could I rise up on my feet, but lay as I was laid down by my nurse.
Even to the lambs, calves and young colts, You gave greater wisdom and strength than You gave Your servant. I said: Why, then, shall I glorify You or sing songs in Your praise? Why shall I pray to You; Your ways are unalterable and Your Voice does not answer me.
You are void as the wind; You are neither Person, nor Wisdom, nor Ignorance. And as for Your servants, who say they hear Your Voice, behold, they are mad! I said: How can a man hear You? It is the reflection of himself he hears. How can a man see You? It is the reflection of himself he sees.
And You allowed me to become strong, as to strength, and wise as to self, even as I called to You in my vanity. Yes, I prided myself in myself; and as to You, I sought to disprove You whenever possible. And the worthlessness of prayer to You I exposed as a great vanity. Yes, I craved wisdom for the sake of showing that You were neither wise nor good. And to this end You also gave to me. And I became conceited in hiding my conceit, even from my own understanding, so that I could carry all points.
I pointed to the fool, saying: Behold, Jehovih’s son! I pointed to the desert place, saying: Behold, Jehovih’s fruitful earth! To the mountain, which is rocks and barren, saying: Behold, how Jehovih has finished His work! And of the evil man, who murders his brother, I said: Jehovih, good in one thing, good in all!
But I did not know the hand that was upon me; You were answering my prayer every day. Yes, I ventured to judge You with my eyes and my ears and my own understanding. In the place I stood, I judged You and Your works, O Jehovih! And the craft of my speech won applause; by flattery I was puffed up. And I deemed my judgment the right one; and whoever did not see as I saw, I condemned or pitied; yes, I craved great speech so that I could expose them in their folly.
And in this You also answered me by giving freely; and my words were reckoned great words and wise. And I was quoted and praised far and near. Yes, I practiced good works so I could show others that, even in good works, a belief in You was vanity and a waste of judgment.
Yes, I craved means and great treasures so that I could render good to others, in order for my own philosophy to seem the highest of the high. And even in this You rendered to me great treasures and ample means; and by my good works done to others, I was applauded as a great and good God above all others.
I craved a heavenly kingdom so I could prove to billions my great wisdom and power; for I pitied those whom I thought foolishly dwelt in darkness in regard to You. And even yet, You, O Jehovih, did not cut me off; but gave me a great kingdom of seven billion!
And I taught them my philosophy: that there was nothing above them; that You, O Jehovih, did not see, did not hear, did not answer. Yes, I made my will all-powerful so that I could cut them off from You. But alas for me.
I had been like the sylph of old who stole into the musical instruments and put them out of tune. My kingdom was divided into seven billion philosophers, every one mad in his own conceit, and in a different way. There was no harmony among them. Yes, they were a kingdom of growlers and cursers! I had carried away the tuning fork, for I had cast You out, O Jehovih! My own philosophy had done it all.
Because I set myself up as the All Highest, You indulged me; and I became the highest God of my people. Yes, they cast their plaudits on me at first, but afterward all their ills and their curses. Neither could I satisfy them in anything in heaven or earth; nor could I turn them off from me, for I had bound them to me by my great promises.
I became as one in a cloud, because of the great trouble upon me and because of the fear. And yet You, O Jehovih, did not forget me; but sent Your Gods’ words to me, imploring me what to do, so that I might be delivered in season. But how could I hear you, O Jehovih, or listen to Your Gods? Behold, my pride had swallowed me up, I was encompassed on every side. Because I had denied You before, I must deny You still.
Then greater darkness came upon me; Your light was obstructed by the walls I had built up against You; truly I had cut myself off from You! Then came the crash, as if heaven and earth shattered! I was cast into the chasm; my kingdom was upon me! The leadership and vanity I had sown had cast me into hell! I was in death, but could not die!
A knot was bound upon me; foul-smelling slaves were clinched upon me, millions of them, tens of millions; and the shafts of their curses pierced my soul; I was as one lacerated and bound in salt; choked and suffocated with foul gases. But yet, You, O Jehovih, did not desert me; but held my judgment from flying away into chaos.
And Your Voice came to me in the time of my tortures; came as the argument of the Most High! It was like myself speaking to myself, saying: He who forever casts away all things, can never be bound in hell; he who craves and holds fast, is already laying the foundation for torments.
And I cried out to You, O Jehovih, saying: O if only I had possessed nothing! No talents, no craft, no philosophy. That I had told these wretches to go to You, O Jehovih! O if only I had told them You alone could bless them, or supply them! But I sought to lead them, and lo, they are upon me!
O if I could be freed from them. That I could turn about in an opposite way from my former years; having nothing, craving nothing, but a right to serve You, O My Father!
You sent Your Gods into the depths of hell, and they delivered me. And I made an oath to You, O Jehovih, to serve You forever. And You gave me labor, and I bowed myself down to labor for Your drujas, with all my wisdom and strength forever! And Your hand came upon me and gave me great power; power even over my own soul to create happy thoughts.
Why should I not praise You, O my Father? You gave me liberty in all my ways, and answered me according to my desires. Not once have You turned away from me or afflicted me; but because of my own vanity I cut myself off from You. Yes, You have shown me that to glorify You is the foundation of the highest happiness; to sing to You is the greatest delight; to praise You is the highest wisdom.
And now Ahura halted in his speech a while, and, still standing in the middle of the throne, burst into tears. Presently he said:
Anuhasaj was my good friend. It was he who since then took the name De’yus, and afterward proclaimed himself the Creator. I weep in pity for him. He is in hell now!
He was my best friend in the time of my darkness. And after I was delivered out of hell, he came and labored with me, full of repentance and love. Often we rested in each other’s arms. Afterward, he traveled far and near in Your great heavens, O Jehovih.
And when he returned to this earth’s heavens he did not come to see me. And I was brokenhearted because of my great love for him. Then he founded his heavenly place and called it Hored. And I called out to You, O Jehovih, as to what message I should send him, for I foresaw his kingdom would be broken up and himself ultimately cast into hell.
And You gave me liberty to send him a message in my own way. And in the anguish of my broken heart I sent him a message, saying, in substance, I no longer have any love for you! And I chided him and upbraided him because he did not come to see me, to gratify my burning love. And I foretold him the great darkness and the hell that would come upon him, even as they now are.
Now I repent, O Jehovih, that I sent him such a message! For nearly two thousand years my message has been to me as if I swallowed a living coal of fire!
Ahura ceased. Lika spoke, saying: Because you have pleaded for De’yus, you have turned the etherean hosts to him. To you I allot the restoration of De’yus, alias Anuhasaj. In the proper time my hosts will take you to the hell where he is bound, and you shall be the first to receive him.
Lika then proclaimed a day of recreation, for there were millions of ethereans who desired to meet Ahura and greet him with love and praise.